It's Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self

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However, to be fair to the author, she does not argue that the change triangle is the only viable therapeutic framework; instead, it's the one she prefers. Distancing ourselves from the emotion, and not attaching or identifying ourselves with it, can have a really big change in our day-to-day lives. She runs a practice on the Upper West Side of Manhattan and was the Mental Health Consultant for the Emmy and Golden Globe-winning show Mad Men.

This book would be super helpful for anyone looking to understand themselves better and get to the root of what’s causing all the anxiety/depression in their lives. This book may be useful for those who lack even the slightest bit of self-awareness but I am not that person.This practical and clearly written self-help book written by a gifted therapist helps the reader learn the incredible importance of understanding and accepting your core emotions and the variety of ways we use defenses and other emotions (anxiety, guilt, and shame) to protect us (even though they cause us pain as well).

Tell him you are upset about something and want to talk about it, If you don't have a friend nearby, perhaps seek out a support group. Your book is incredibly insightful as a road map for beginning to pinpoint and understand emotions and their source. Focus on sensations of anxiety: Tune in to the physical sensations of your anxiety, like a quickly beating heart or butterflies in your stomach. Prior to reading the book I had not read Hilary's article in the NYT or anything by Diane Fosha but I was aware of the existence of AEDP, just not the details. Hendel does a phenomenal job of unpacking and breaking down decades of work dissecting the human brain into simple, compassionate tools of self help.

Moreover, Hilary Jacobs Hendel’s writing is lucid and accessible, which makes her method as clear and practical as you can get in self-help titles. Worth practicing though, because I think it can deepen our connection to our bodies and how emotions (something that seems intangible) truly affect the tangible aspects of our being. And there are inhibitory emotions, like shame, guilt and anxiety, which serve to block you from experiencing core emotions. Hilary's book is such a great explanation of how to deal with your emotions in healthy ways and in doing so, we can become more integrated, authentic and whole. The author just talks about past experiences from childhood that may have carried into one's adult life.

It has long been suggested that our attachment styles in childhood explain our adult relationships and Hendel explains that trauma is the root cause of our psychological distress. I also like how she says that “core emotions are like ocean waves” - emotions will first intensify before they lessen, like riding a wave that rises and falls.Most of the book is a recitation of success stories of Hendel's clients successes in working the triangle. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice. To relieve her patients’ suffering, psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel switched from practicing traditional talk psychotherapy to Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP). In these states, thinking, problem solving, and rationality are compromised, if not shut off entirely. We can all be taught to rediscover our core emotions with The Change Triangle, an easy to learn tool that Hendel uses to help people move through emotions to a place of calm and which is an important part of healing anxiety and depression.